Thursday, September 2, 2010

Meningitis Blues

Why CrossFit? Because no amount of aseptic viral meningitis can ever keep you from overhead squating an IV stand - with meds attatched, mind you!

Viral Meningitis. Seriously? Kinda sounds like a venereal disease. Saying it to your friends almost makes you blush: Hello, my name is Jeremy and I have viral meningitis. What? Like you've been promiscuous? Ummm, No. Meningitis basically means that the protective "shell" of your brain and spinal cord, the meninges, is inflammed. The best part is, unlike venereal disease, you don't even have to sleep with 7 out of 10 students at Missouri State (10 out of 10 at Mizzou) to get it!!! Whoo hoo! Zing. It also means that you'll feel like your head got smashed under the weight of a thousand pound barbell, you'll be unable to look down, light will suck, standing upright will suck more, and the cumulative effect of these symptoms will result in nausea and, ultimately, vomiting. I know what your thinking: Isn't that how crossfitters feel everyday? On one hand, your absolutely right. Yes. Touch'e. On the other hand, this was the most painful "headache" feeling I've ever experience in my life. I went to bed Monday night feeling great about my "Jackie" PR and the clever jabs I took at myself on my last blog-post...slept like a babe. I woke up Tuesday with Thor's hammer handle sticking out of my earhole. I mean my head literally felt like someone shoved a chainsaw up my nose and turned it on. And it just got worse. As the day wore on, even after leaving work, going home, laying down, and resting, I started running a fever. Which, I would argue, is better than running at a feverish pace, but that's niether here nor there. Anyways, short story long: I knew something wasn't right so I went to the ER and was greeted in the triage waiting area by some random dude who handed me a flier and business card trying to solicit me to join his tykwando studio. I kid you not if I'd have been able to see straight I would've judo-chopped that clown straight in the neck. Instead I just muttered, "Dude, your timing seriously sucks" and let Jenny shoot her deadly eye-glare darts at him (which, trust me, are much more lethal than judo-chops). After a CT scan of my dome, a lumbar spinal tap ("this one goes to eleven"), a brain MRI, and enough pain meds, anti-virals, and anti-biotics to both cure and severely sedate the entire nation of Khasakhstan and just one of the Jonas brothers (you may choose which one lives- the rest will die!), the doctors here are now assured with 53% certainty that it is definitely possible that I may or may not have aseptic viral meningitis. They should maybe know for sure tomorrow when they get the final lab reports. Either way, I'm feeling much better than I did 2 days ago. The headaches are subsiding along with all of the other symptoms. I do feel a little weak because I was restricted to a liquid only diet for the first 48 hours, but obviously not so weak that I can't still overhead squat my IV stand. Finally getting to eat solids today was like Christmas morning. My doctor says this whole deal is probably a by-product of a minor shingles outbreak I had a couple of weeks ago. He thinks it's likely that I'll never have anything like this happen again and that the reason it happened this time is "lightning struck". He is hopeful I'll be able to get out of here tomorrow. I've had a few brave visitors mask and gown up to see me - to whom I'm extremely grateful. I'm also very appreciative for the numerous texts, phone calls, and CFS blog comments I've recieved from everyone. The prayers and words of support and encouragement were effective and have truly helped to lift my spirit. I'm very much missing my Jenny and my Vin and being able to kick it with them. I'm also missing the gym and hanging with my CrossFit Springfield fam'. Can't wait to get back to coaching classes, training clients, and the daily grind. In this situation as with all things in my life, whether good or bad, I will continue to trust in God's hand, His ultimate plan, and His purpose. It's all good.


  1. first off, praying for a speedy recovery for you. hoping you feel better every minute.
    secondly...i laughed through this post. so funny. quirky really.

  2. I love this picture so very much! I might print it up and put it on my locker at work! I hope your nurse saw this picture as well as the Allaris IV pump rep! However... I hope I never walk in and see any of my patients overhead squatting their IV pole. That is a quick way to buy your self some restraints! Please tell me you sent this picture to Main Site!!! Glad to hear you are feeling better. Can't wait to see you around the gym again soon!

  3. See... this post proves why I'm completely convinced you need to write a book. It would be legend... wait for it... ary!